


The Variables

by ATouchOfCommonSense



Series: In Which Living With Ghosts Becomes the New Normal [3]
Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Aftermath of Possession, Alternate Universe - Ghosts, Alternate Universe - Human, Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders & Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders Are Twins, He Doesn't Get Much Better Either, Logic | Logan Sanders Angst, Logic | Logan Sanders Has Issues, Logic | Logan Sanders-centric, M/M, Nothing he can't deal with he just refuses to talk or really think about his past, Possession, Remus Is Not Great, Shock, Slight Graphic Description Of Wound, Social Anxiety, Sorry Not Sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-05
Updated: 2020-08-05
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:46:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25720786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ATouchOfCommonSense/pseuds/ATouchOfCommonSense
Summary: In which Remus makes himself known in a very obtrusive way, and Logan must come to terms with the fact that life can't always be totally in his control.9/18/20 - Both chapters heavily revised.2/15/20 - (Another) grammatical revision. I began writing the next instalment this month so be on the lookout!
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders
Series: In Which Living With Ghosts Becomes the New Normal [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1730026
Comments: 11
Kudos: 87





	1. Violation

**Author's Note:**

> I know it's been ages, but here is the next installment in my series! If you are new here, I highly suggest you read the first two fics before this, as much of this story references past events. If you are a returning reader, hello! I missed you all and I hope you enjoy this next story. Feedback is always appreciated ;)

It was about a week after Logan had learned he would be sharing his recently purchased country house with sentient translucent beings. It was one of the biggest shocks of his life, and Logan was still half-convinced he had gone completely insane and was spending hours of the day arguing with himself about the origins of alternative music and theories regarding inherited versus learned talents. Either way, it was easier to believe what he saw and heard on a daily basis was true, and Logan planned to treat it as such until he was proved otherwise.

It seemed ironic, given Logan’s previous distaste for and general avoidance of people, but he was growing used to the quirks and eccentricities of having three individuals cohabit his home to the point where he almost enjoyed their company. Some problems had to be addressed, of course, such as no flickering the lights or showing up in his room in the middle of the night, but those were quickly addressed, and Logan was well on his way to tolerating the ghosts that metaphorically and literally floated into his life seven short days ago.

*

Because of Logan’s enormous lapse in judgment regarding a certain “gift-giving” that crushed his bank account a couple of days ago, his funds for the week were running dangerously low. This meant he was lacking in reading material, having planned to purchase new literary material after the move. This left Logan wracking his brain for any book he owned that could serve as a thought-provoking piece before bed that night. He had an hour to kill, and he refused to use it reading a book he had memorized, as was the case with most of his self-owned books at the time.

After a few moments of contemplation in his living room overstuffed armchair, Logan was reminded of the one thing he had purchased for himself on his last official outing. It was a book, one he remembered buying not so much by choice, but more like an order that he followed blindly, before coming to his senses long after the book was purchased. He recalled the event with confusion but chalked it up to utter and total intrigue in the strange book. Intrigue that compelled him to make a rather pricey purchase with little to no thought. 

Logan made his way to his bedroom and crouched by his bed, sweeping a hand underneath. He had hidden the book, mostly because it was an embarrassing genre to own. Logan prided himself in his collection of books, which was made up of educational texts, highly renowned literary classics, and certainly no fantasy.

Logan pulled the book out of its hiding spot and stared at the strange pattern on the front cover. It was not made of overly-expensive material, but the silver swirls that adorned the maroon cover did stand out brilliantly. After a moment of marvel, Logan opened the book. Just as it did in the medieval shop, the title page read: Mythological Beasts and Other Imaginary Creatures of the Night, By Anne Boleyn.

Logan sat on his bed and turned the page, instantly but perplexingly enamored with non-traditional text. Instead of a _Table of Contents_ Logan expected to skim through, the second page of the strange book began the novel. The top of the page was titled: “Ghosts: As Imaginary as You Believe Them to Be”. It was lengthy for a chapter title, not to mention the lack of lead-in or relation to the title of the book. Logan already had a plethora of complaints relating to this poorly formatted group of words bound in a book-like fashion. Despite his misgivings, Logan read on.

Logan’s eyes jumped to the first line of body text when suddenly his eyes began dramatically unfocusing. He squinted at the page and brought the book closer to his face, trying to make out the words, but it was no use. It was as if someone had placed a glaze over his eyes, blurring his vision dramatically. He squeezed his eyes shut, then opened them again, only to find with dismay that his vision had worsened to the point of color splotches shifting and contorting in front of him.

On top of his loss of sight, Logan was hit with a sudden and fierce pounding in his sinuses and when he attempted to bring his hands to his head to relieve pressure, he discovered his arms, too, were failing him. His extremities loosened and heavied until Logan could not even twitch his fingertips. If his mind had been working properly, Logan would have called for help or tried to diagnose what was happening before he lost consciousness. Alas, Logan’s mind slowed with the rest of him, until darkness crowded the limp man’s vision. Logan heard the thump of what he presumed was the infamous book landing on his hardwood floor before unconsciousness overtook him, and all was dark.

*

Logan had to stop accusing himself of insanity. His self-directed accusations were undoubtedly true, but chanting “This is crazy, this is crazy, I must really be crazy,” was never very helpful or calming when he found himself immersed in an inexplicable event where his sanity was called into question. Looking back, Logan would wager the opposite to be more true.

Such was the case when Logan felt himself rise from his bed and take a deep, slow breath without the slightest hint of effort to do so. Feeling panic well up inside him, Logan made an effort to sit back down on the bed and ask himself what had just happened. When he tried to do so, however, it became apparent that Logan was no longer in charge of his physical capacities, which was something of a problem. He told himself to sit back down and he did not. He thought clearly and with no confusion ‘bend each leg at the knee and lower yourself onto the bed behind you’ and even with step-by-step instructions he continued to stand as if he were merely a spectator in a movie with no say as to what happens on the screen. 

His body--Logan’s previously perfectly functioning and obedient body--took a shaky step forward completely against his will. Desperately, Logan willed himself to cease his actions with much the same result as before. Instead of reacting to Logan, his body began walking in a slow circle, surveying his room like it was the first time. He watched, not with a small bit of hysteria, as his traitorous body made its way to the front of his bedroom door and reached out a hand.

Before his world was turned upside down with no warning or viable explanation, Logan considered himself to be fairly level headed. He had never exhibited strong symptoms of any medical issues, least of all a mental one. 

And then, the unthinkable happened. After his mother died, normal life became too much for Logan. The people that he once tolerated or were annoyed by seemed to sneak up on him and cause his chest to leap and constrict in a holy unfamiliar manor. They would ask questions he knew the answer to, yet for the life of him could not get the words out of his mouth. Going to work began to be less of a mundane chore and more of a battle between his rational mind and his misplaced fears. 

He would stand at the door to his crappy apartment and close his eyes, trying to work past the beating in his chest. When he made it outside, he would soundlessly chant, “Eight hours. You will be home in eight hours and after that, you do not have to see another human being until tomorrow.” After a month or so, he quit his job and started working online. It was simpler. He did not see a therapist, though he should have. This was the first time Logan asked himself if there was something extremely wrong with the inside of his head.

The country was the only way to ensure he stayed away from other people. People were messy and complicated and hurtful and strangely concerned for him. People were composed of everything he could not handle anymore. After moving out to the middle of nowhere, Logan was content to believe he had fixed the problem. He had removed all mentally destabilizing variables from the equation and he was now left with a calm, albeit ghost-infused, lifestyle. 

When Logan had begun formal schooling, which was much later than most students as his mother had homeschooled him for the better part of his primary education, there was nothing he did that the other children saw as normal. He spoke funny and knew unimportant facts and got perfect scores on tests. He did not have friends and would not rise to the bait when stupid children taunted him about every aspect of his life. Logan was familiar with feeling out of place in a setting, but not in his own skin. Not even his mother’s death brought that unfamiliarity upon him, though it did bring about a new layer to human interaction he was not equipped to handle.

Logan watched himself with fear and betrayal as his one and only infinite constant was ripped away from him in the most vivid way. He was absolutely out of control. He was out of place in his previous sanctuary, left to wonder wildly if he would have benefited from a shrink when he had the chance.

Logan thought he had controlled the variables. As it turns out, one can not remove one’s mind from the equation. He tried desperately to freeze, or slow down, or even just look in another direction. Instead, Logan slowly sauntered out of his bedroom and down the hall completely against his will. Unbidden, a face-splitting smile spread across Logan’s face that was so contrary to what Logan was feeling that he stopped trying to resist and simply let his panic consume him. There was nothing he could do. He was trapped in his own mind with nothing but the words ‘powerless, powerless, powerless’ to wrap himself in.

When he reached the living room, his eyes that were no longer his own set steadily on the front door, Logan felt a tingling spread around his torso and up his back that caused his body to stop in its tracks. The feeling took a second to discern, but it soon solidified into something similar to a hug.

The unnatural grin on his face fell away and his body looked down to see Patton, looking much more solid than usual, hugging him. 

“Please let go of Logan,” Patton whispered. “He’s too good for you. You don’t need to do this.”

“Let go of me,” Logan’s voice sounded slightly annoyed and entirely maniac. It was much more high pitched than usual and was infused with a mixed accent that sounded closer to nails on a chalkboard than human speech. Despite the protests uttered by the voice, Logan’s body made no effort to escape the grasp.

“I won’t. You can’t take him. Logan is my friend.”

His body snorted, then realized how serious Patton was being and raised an amused eyebrow in question. Had Logan been in control of his own body, he would have had a similar reaction.

Patton pressed on, rushed but sincere. “Don’t laugh, I’m serious. Logan moved into this house and, despite his misgivings, accepted myself, Roman, and Virgil as a part of his life. He had true conversations with us and made us feel more welcome in our home than any other living person. He even bought us things to put in our rooms, did I mention he lets us have our own rooms? When Logan found out I had been staying in the basement and Virgil and Roman lived in the attic, he said, ‘I’ll stay out of those floors, I suppose. I don’t need that much room for storage anyway.’ Logan is a good person. Please don’t do this. Your rage is misplaced.”

Logan was floored. Surly Patton was over exaggerating. He thought Virgil was being overly generous in his compliments, and here Patton was, singing his supposed virtues to a stranger. At least, he/she/they/it was a stranger to Logan. Patton seemed to think there was something to be reasoned with that was separate from Logan inside of him.

After a stare-off between Patton and his body, Logan felt himself begin to go limp. His head lolled towards Patton and his legs buckled until he was completely leaning on Patton’s struggling form. Patton tightened his grip and squeezed his eyes shut, clearly having trouble with holding up Logan’s weight as he was still mostly an incorporeal being. It was a few more seconds before Logan blinked, blinked again, then willed his legs to support himself. 

Logan had never been so happy to be able to stand by himself.

“There you are,” Patton smiled weakly, and with a shiver, Patton was back to his mostly see-through self.

“Here-” Logan’s voice cracked. “Here I am.” 

Logan stared a Patton for a moment, before slowly bringing his eyes down to see his body, which was once again fully in his command. He patted his hands against his side, a thrill going through him with his ability to do so. Nothing much was going through his head except, “Thank the heavens, I’m free.”

Patton, meanwhile, rubbed at his arms searching for something to say, a little uncomfortable to be stared at so hard by Logan’s muddled self. “I’m sorry you had to go through that. It’s absolutely awful.”

Feeling interrupted in his relishing of freedom, Logan looked down at his body and grimaced. “And what did I experience, exactly?” 

“You sort of…” Patton began before pausing, his expression pinching as if it hurt to get the words out. “Got possessed.” 

“Oh,” Logan responded, because how do you respond to your ghostly, self-declared friend after they tell you in not so many words that another ghost had inserted itself into your being and went for a stroll? He had kind of assumed something of the sort had happened, but hearing it from his previously declared friend was something else entirely.

“They’re gone for now,” Patton said quietly, and Logan looked over his shoulder, surprised he did not check for other visible entities sooner. “They're around, though. They’ll be back as soon as they realize they’re stuck here with the rest of us.”

Logan gathered a few things from Patton’s statement. One, the ghost that had just violated Logan was still in this house; two, they were stuck there for the rest of time; and three, they were only temporarily dissuaded from body-napping and would most likely try again as soon as they came to their senses. 

He wanted to ask if all ghosts could do what this one had. He wanted to know if he was going to be safe from whatever had just inserted itself into his body and forced his limbs into unbidden movements. He really wanted to understand how Patton knew what was going on and what made him seek Logan out in the first place. Instead, Logan decided to start with an open-ended, perhaps more palatable question. “Would you be willing to offer some insight as to what just happened? As you well know, I am not versed in the subject of ghosts, let alone possession.”

“Um,” Patton offered eloquently, attempting to hide his uncomfortable expression by looking away from Logan. “I could- well, maybe you might want to… Nevermind. I think I’d better get Virgil and Roman. They’ll… help.”

Patton didn’t sound very confident about that, but he shot through the ceiling with more enthusiasm than his words suggested. It seemed Patton was more fleeing the situation than eager to get help, but Logan found he did not mind so much. He needed to collect his thoughts.

Logan stood in the middle of his living room feeling lost. He knew Patton would have rather he refrained from his line of questioning, but Logan could hardly bring himself to care, given the circumstances. He deserved some answers, especially after experiencing something as bazaar and scarring as being a passenger in one’s own body. Thinking about how it felt to be out of control, to have himself and the variables of his life overridden without warning, plunged Logan into an icy sea of anxiety. It was as if he had been abandoned in the arctic with nothing but his paranoia to keep him company. He could not think of anything except how he had felt as his body ignored his commands and left Logan to see a world through actions not of his own.

Logan’s breathing began to quicken.

*


	2. A New Ghost In Town

It took a while for Virgil, Roman, and Patton to rush into the room. When they appeared, Patton was wringing his hands nervously and receiving a tongue lashing from Virgil, who had immediately shot towards Logan upon arrival.

“Why did you leave him alone?” Virgil bit out angrily, floating over to Logan and staring into his eyes. 

“I don’t know! He was asking questions and I thought you guys would be better at answering them!” Patton cried.

“You could have started with, ‘Logan was just possessed’ rather than telling it from the beginning, Pat. There is a time for start to finish dramatic retellings, and now was not the time,” Roman said, looking a fair bit calmer than Virgil, for once.

“He’s definitely in shock. Why didn’t you just yell for us?”

Logan put up his hands in a placating manner. They were overreacting. Whatever had happened was done with and all he needed now were some answers. And to catch his breath. “I’m not in shock. People go into shock after experiencing a traumatic event that caused them emotional distress. I am not emotionally distressed, I am simply a bit confused. If any of you would feel comfortable answering a few of my ques-”

“You do realize, Off Brand Rolex, _you’ve_ just experienced a traumatic event?” Roman rolled his eyes like Logan was the stupid one here. Logan was not stupid, thank you very much. He just wanted some answers, which no one seemed to want to give him. “And your shaking. If that isn’t emotionally distressed for you, I don’t know what is.”

Logan looked down to see that he was, in fact, shaking. Quite violently, considering he hadn’t noticed before now. Perhaps, Logan admitted to himself under extreme duress, questions were best held onto for the time being.

“Logan,” Virgil cut in. “I want you to move over to the couch, okay? You are in shock, accept it and we'll move on. We really should get you a shock blanket or something...” Virgil trailed off, glancing around the living room for something heavy to drape over Logan’s trembling form.

Unfortunately, Logan was not entirely focused on listening to Virgil at that moment. He stared at his shaking hands in bewilderment. “Did you know, Emotional Shock is not an official clinical diagnosis? Shock, when a response from a traumatic but not physically damaging event of which symptoms persist past a certain point, is most commonly diagnosed under the name Acute Stress Disorder and can be very serious if not treated. It can largely mirror PTSD in terms of flashbacks and emotional distress, although there are some major differences-” 

“-gan. Logan!” 

“Yes, Virgil?” Logan was a little annoyed at having been cut off, but he was mostly just glad to have a distraction from his raising heart. He felt jittery and was now doing everything in his power not to think about what had just happened to his defenseless self. He worried that if he dwelled on it for any longer, whatever that thing was would come back and overtake him again, leaving Logan as a bystander in his own skin-

“Logan, you need to listen to me, okay? You are going to move over to the couch and lie down. Roman is going to get you a heavy blanket.”

“Me? Why me?”

“Because I said so. Please stop arguing,” Virgil sighed, not unlike a parent to an unruly child. Logan’s lips twitched as he pictured Virgil bossing Roman around and justifying it with “because I said so” just like Logan’s mother would do to him if he asked too many questions.

Logan, finally processing Virgil’s request enough to act upon it, started making his way over to the couch. For some reason, his legs felt like bendy straws, rigid and stiff but ready to bend in half at the slightest bit of pressure. His state must have been noticeable because Logan felt an arm snake around his waist to hold him up. There was a lot of touching going on tonight, considering the supposed difficulty ghosts had with that kind of thing. Looking to his left, Logan observed Virgil pressed against Logan’s side, guiding him to the couch. Virgil felt much like a human, if a little cooler to the touch, “You are much better at this than Patton.” Logan pointed out, remembering the huge effort Patton needed to support him a few minutes ago.

“That’s not very nice,” Virgil frowned. “Patton probably just saved your life. You should be thanking him.”

Logan didn’t respond to that, opting to put all his energy into walking to the couch in the most normal-looking way possible. Given his current position in relation to Virgil, Logan wasn’t sure how convincing he was. 

It was only after Logan was laying on the couch and Roman had deposited his comforter on top of him haphazardly that Patton spoke for the second time since coming down from fetching the others.

“I really am sorry you had to go through that, kiddo. Had I known you brought home an inhabited artifact, I would have warned you sooner.”

Inappropriately, Logan snorted. An inhabited artifact indeed. Thinking back to the strange pull he had towards the book in the first place, Logan isn’t sure a warning would have made any difference in relation to the outcome.

“I am less concerned with what has happened in the past and more concerned with what I may be susceptible to in the future.” This, to Logan’s credit, was not a complete lie. He was concerned with the future and his safety in it, but he was equally concerned over what had just transpired. Logan got the feeling that no one, himself included, wanted to talk about that, though.

“Okay,” Virgil said resolutely. “Let's talk about the future, then.”

**

“You were just possessed by a ghost who had been trapped in an object for God knows how long. It’s like how we are bound to this house, that ghost was bound to the inside of the artifact, which is about as miserable as you might imagine. So, that trapped ghost can lure victims to act as a new vessel for their souls. Unfortunately for you, that soul chose your body as its vessel and pushed you out of control to ‘make room’, so to speak. 

“After Patton convinced them to leave, the ghost was freed from you, and the object it had inhabited before. So theoretically, the ghost wouldn’t be attached to anything. But a ghost has to be attached to something, it can't just float around the world on a whim. This is why possession appeals to ghosts. We can go wherever we want if we are attached to a vessel with moving parts. 

“We are going to assume this ghost was forced to attach to the house, as it is the biggest vessel in the area and allows for the most freedom of movement. This is bad news for us if they decide to pull that little stunt again, but I doubt they will. Possession is novel and exciting the first time, but it’s not all that it's cracked up to be. Possessions can only be maintained for so long, and it is often born from a place of rage. Once their resolve to possess is broken once, well. Let’s just say that you are relatively safe.”

That was a pretty great outlook, considering Logan was half expecting to have to endure possession again.

“That’s… good?” Logan asked. It was good that he was not going to be possessed again, but Virgil had explained the situation from the perspective of the ghost, whose situation did not seem to be all that great. Even if they had just put Logan through what some would consider a traumatic event. Logan couldn’t help but think that Virgil had some grim sort of empathy for that ghost.

“Yeah, kiddo,” Patton said softly, floating over to sit on the edge of the couch. “That is very good.”

Logan looked at Patton, then Virgil, then Roman, who was still standing close to the door not unlike a guard dog. Whom he expected to intrude and how he intended to stop them was beyond Logan.

“In summary,” Logan began, hoping to sort this out soon so he could actually sleep sometime tonight. “I was possessed, I might, but might not, get possessed again, and we have to live with this other ghost for the rest of time due to some very inconvenient ghost laws of physics.”

The three nodded as if nothing with that statement was out of the ordinary in the slightest. 

“But, don’t forget. There is a really good chance you won’t get possessed because it’s not as great for the ghost as people assume!” Patton reminded him, a bit too cheerfully.

“Right.”

For some reason, this situation struck Logan as hilarious. He was just possessed. By a ghost. And it was terrifying and mentally taxing and surreal. Most of all, it was so far beyond what Logan had ever thought the world was capable of. Logan grinned at the craziness of it all.

Three worried faces met his glee. Logan may have to laugh about his situation in private; his ghostly friends did not seem to see the humor.

“Are you feeling okay, kiddo?”

“You definitely need to get to bed,” Virgil decided, not allowing Logan to answer the obvious question. “Go get whatever the ghost came out of and a match. We have one thing left to do.”

*

Logan had trouble getting to sleep that night. He had, at Virgil’s request, burned the book that the ghost had once inhabited, but it didn’t make him feel much better about sleeping. Every time he closed his eyes, his brain asked him if he could still move his legs, still open his eyes, if he was still in control. Logan had to keep reminding himself that Virgil said he was safe because all Logan’s consciousness seemed to take from Virgil’s answers was that that ghost was somewhere in his house. Logan didn’t think he could deal with meeting his captor any time soon.

*

Logan woke up to the sound of glass breaking. Thought abandoned him as he threw back his covers and dashed out of his door. Later, he will admit to himself that he was worried that someone had cut themselves, despite living with beings that could faze through solid objects with ease. Illogical and sentimental, but true.

As he reached the bottom of the stairs, Logan froze. Patton, Roman, and Virgil were nowhere in sight. Instead, surrounded by broken glass and spilled water, was another ghost. An unfamiliar, probably his captor ghost.

He was almost as pale as Virgil and wore a light green button-up dress shirt and black flared dress pants with pointy black dress shoes. His hair was numerous ugly colors, puke green and neon orange being two of many. His outfit and hair were eye-catching and absurd, but the most alarming fact about this man was not his clothing. It was undoubtedly the ax.

One would think there would be a fair bit of blood to compliment an ax sticking out of one’s head, but as Logan stood and stared at the hair-raising ghost in his kitchen, he could see little more than a jagged slice of flesh to indicate an injury. Logan was not awake enough to contemplate this fact further.

“Virgil!” Logan called, with a bit more panic than he had meant to. 

Virgil materialized instantly next to him, proving he had already been watching the new ghost before Logan had shown up. 

“We have a new house guest, I see,” Virgil commented with a menacing raised eyebrow towards the stranger.

“Hello,” the man replied in the same mixed accent that had come out of Logan’s mouth the night before. “My name is Remus.”

To Logan, his voice was still like nails on a chalkboard. He winced and fought the urge to look away, trying to get a hold of himself. Logan was still free. This ghost would not possess him. At least, that’s what Virgil thought. Logan could not believe he was putting his freedom in the hands of someone else.

“Hi,” Virgil deadpanned, looking like perhaps he wanted to remove the ax from Remus’ head and reinsert it into his skull. “You’re a dick.”

Remus looked comically surprised and took a moment to theatrically recover before plastering on what could reasonably be misconstrued as a grin. “Relax, I didn’t do anything too bad. Thanks to your sappy little friend, I didn’t even step out the front door!”

“That ‘sappy’ friend’s name is Patton and he’s my best friend so you’d better watch it. And just for the record,” Virgil growled. “Logan is my friend too, so you’d better promise not to use him as your puppet ever again.”

Remus rolled his eyes in a way that reminded Logan of Roman. It was unsettling to compare the two. 

“Yeah, yeah. I promise. It’s not like I could make myself do it again anytime soon anyway.”

Virgil’s murderous glare melted into a grin as he glanced over at Logan and tried to elbow him in lieu of saying “See, I told you!” Unfortunately, Virgil forgot to solidify himself and he ended up elbowing through Logan. 

Clearing his throat in recovery, Virgil gave a terse nod and called for back up. “Roman, Patton, you might want to get in here!”

After a second, Patton rose up with a grim, wholly unfamiliar expression. Logan was sort of surprised everyone besides Remus seemed to see this as a big deal. Logan had been scared out of his mind and violated beyond words, but for some reason, he didn’t expect anyone else to see it that way. His mother’s words floated through his head. ‘You’re fine, dearie. Don’t fuss to get your way, it’s not proper.’

Roman came in next. Always one for the dramatics, he dove headfirst through the ceiling and twirled to face the group before landing before them in a suspiciously karate-like stance. When he came to face them, however, his stance fell away and his face went slack with shock as his eyes fell upon Remus, who was already staring at Roman with similar disbelief. Logan, Patton, and Virgil looked back and forth between the characters, all seeming to be as in the dark as the others.

“Roman,” Virgil cut the silence with caution. “Do you know this scumbag?”

Roman’s mouth moved in response but no sound came out.

Virgil waited, but Roman gave up speaking and simply continued to stare. Virgil kept his eyes on Roman as he said, “Do you know Roman, Remus?”

Remus’s head jerked towards Virgil at the sound of his name, looking almost scared.

“Um… Yes. He’s… he’s...”

“My brother!” Roman cut in, a bit too loudly after having found his voice again. He quieted as he said, “My twin, to be exact.”

There was a beat of silence before the room erupted in noise.

“You have a twin? And you never told us!?” Patton yelped.

“No, you would have told me if you had a twin. Right?” Virgil’s incredulous expression inching towards betrayal at Roman’s downcast eyes and a grim expression.

“Why do you think I didn’t tell you? I mean, look at him!”

“Excuse me, I won’t stand here being insulted while you all-”

“Oh shut it! You just possessed Logan, that is crime enough without looking at your outfit-”

“Can someone please explain to me why my _boyfriend_ didn’t tell me about some secret evil sibling-”

“Everybody needs to just calm down-”

“So how did you die, huh? Someone gets overzealous at ax throwing practice? I’ll bet it was Kelly. She was always giving you weird looks-”

“You are such a bastard, Kelly was my girlfriend-”

“You don’t even like girls and you know it!”

“Roman, if you can’t offer me one good explanation-”

“Oh just because I like boys I can’t like girls anymore? You’ve been dead a long time, Roman. Maybe I’m more complex than some check box-”

“As if! We’ve had this conversation!”

“But Roman, don’t you remember? “I just can’t trust you anymore’? Perhaps I was fibbing then, too!”

“You’re such a bastard!”

“If I’m the bastard, what does that make you? At least I’m still allowed at the estate!”

“Not anymore, you dunce! In case you haven’t noticed, you’re dead!”

“ENOUGH!”

A hush fell over the room as everybody turned their heads around to see Patton, hands on his hips, looking, for all intents and purposes, disappointed. 

“You are behaving like children. We have things that we have to deal with, and none of them involve your little sibling rivalry. Virgil, Logan, and I have some questions, and you are going to answer them civilly, or we will have some serious issues. Do we understand?”

Roman stared at his feet and nodded, properly chastised. Remus didn’t seem very cowered, but he shrugged and kept his mouth shut, so Patton continued.

“We were not made aware that you, Roman, had a twin brother. Care to explain that?”

“Yeah, how could you do that to me?” Virgil cut in before Roman could respond. “I thought we told each other everything? I told you everything!” 

Patton walked over to Virgil and put a hand on his shoulder. “Let’s let him speak, okay?”

Virgil frowned and crossed his arms with a short, “Fine.”

Roman was looking at Virgil with absolute pain that exuded from every pore in his body. “My love, my darling, my light after life, you have to believe me when I say that I did not keep this from you with malicious intent. My brother,” Roman spat, as if ‘brother’ were an insult in itself, “has always been the most shameful and destructive part of my life, despite my many efforts to exclude myself from his games in our life.”

At this, Remus snorted, but with a glare from Patton, he silenced.

“He has always been something of a bomb, emotionally and physically. He would play mind games with my parents and the staff as well as blow things up for his own pleasure. As you can imagine, he created a dreadful environment wherever he went. And I had to coexist with his for the better part of my life.”

Remus rolled his eyes and stepped forward, effectively cutting off Roman’s tirade. “If I remember correctly, Ro, you enjoyed filling empty bottles with gunpowder just as much as I did. It was only the getting-in-trouble part you had an issue with. We had our fun times. It’s only when you grew up did you try to cut me out of my life like a scrapbook picture of an old boyfriend.”

“For good reason!” Roman blurted. “You told mother someone had burglarized our house, something I believed just as much as she did until you came running to show me her diamond earrings you had stolen in the middle of the night. I simply had enough of your deception, the incentive to get away. I will never regret fleeing, though you were not the sole reason for me doing so.”

Virgil’s eyes widened as he let out a gasp as if he had been punched in the stomach. “You told me your parents kicked you out because you were gay!”

“That wasn’t a lie! I did tell my parents I was gay and I never was welcome at the estate again. I just told them at such a time that I was ready to leave.”

“Ha! You told them on the way out the door that you were gay and you weren’t coming home that night. They just reinforced your decision by telling you not to bother coming home the next day! I snuck the earrings back into their room after that, figured they had enough to deal with, having a disgraceful son and all.”

Roman looked at the floor once more and took a deep breath, blinking rapidly and trying to maintain composure. The abrasive retelling of a difficult time in Roman’s life had obviously dredged some long-suppressed emotions. Upon seeing the moisture that had pooled at the corner of Roman’s eyes, Virgil’s angry resolve lessened and he walked into Roman’s arms.

“You can tell me about it later, okay?” Virgil mumbled into his partner’s shirt, hiding his expression. “We’ll figure this out.” 

“Thank you,” Roman whispered into his hair and, drawing a deep breath, continued his narrative for Patton and Logan. He looked much calmer with Virgil no longer directing his anger towards him.

“After that, I didn’t see any more of my brother before the end. I have often wondered if I should have tried to make amends or not, but clearly,” Roman said with a glare at his twin. “It was a fool’s thought.”

Virgil snorted, “That’s not even a saying. It’s “a fool’s errand” and that doesn’t really fit with what you’re trying to say.”

Remus, during all of this, had begun studying Logan with extreme interest. His eyes, a bright hazel green, pierced his skin, and Logan’s heart jumped. He did not want to be here, in the same room as Roman’s evil brother, and he especially did not want to stand here and be scrutinized by a man who had touched the controls that Logan believed solely belonged to himself. 

Logan cleared his throat. “I have but one question, and then I will be retiring to my room, where I will request that no one bother me.” He said this harshly, staring back at Remus, who had assumed a false innocent expression. Logan could only hope the message got through to this unsettling character. 

“I would like to know why, if it is true you will not possess me again, you choose to abstain from possession. I wish to know so I can evaluate for myself if I am truly in danger or not.”

Virgil looked back at Logan, obviously offended that Logan would not take his word for it. But that wasn’t how Logan saw the world. He did not trust one person’s opinion or even the opinion of a great many people. He formed his own conclusions with data he obtained himself. That way, there was no possibility he could blame the conclusions of others on his shortsightedness. His life– his mistakes and triumphs, his failures and successes–were all his own and no one else's. 

Remus shrugged his shoulders at Logan’s question. “I can’t guarantee I won’t possess you again, but I could say so if it’d make you feel better. Truth is, maintaining a whole life form is a lot of work, especially if you’ve been out of practice for a while. If you want some sort of heartfelt promise, you aren’t going to get it. But there is a strong possibility I will never possess anyone again if for nothing accept the difficulty of maintenance. On top of that, being anything other than yourself is very uncomfortable.”

Some people would not be reassured by this statement. If his glare was any indication, Patton seemed to be included in this group. But Logan was not some people. He did not believe in promises or declarations. He dealt with the facts. But all he had was Remus’s word, and Remus considered himself capable of never possessing again, which could be a long time considering his current state of being. It was going to have to be good enough.

“Yeah, try being the other guy,” he said in an uncharacteristically joking manner and turned to escape to the relative safety of his room.

Logan did not like Remus, or respect him, or even believe he will ever come to tolerate his presence in the foreseeable future. But some variables could not be changed. Like bullies in a public school or the death of a parent. Remus was just something that existed, like all of the other things Logan had dealt with in his life. He would conquer them, learn how to live with them, or escape them altogether. 

And Roman, Patton, and Virgil have proved throughout a very trying and draining week that variables did not have to be dealt with alone. Logan would solve this equation, and for the first time in his life, he would not do it alone.

*


End file.
